borrowed from another nearby forum.

A married couple were asleep when the phone rang
at 2 in the morning.The very blonde wife picked up the phone,
listened a moment and said 'How should I know, that's 200 miles
from here!' and hung up.

The husband said, 'Who was that?'

The wife answered, 'I don't know, some woman wanting to know
if the coast is clear.'

************************************************** ***

A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and
buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really
angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is
overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.

The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do it!!!'

The blonde replies, 'Shut up, you're next!'


Thanks Vortec @ MTF

:tour

:smiliesig I got up... shut off the weather radio(the alarm was going off). Got back into bed and dh asked me what the alarm was for? "I don't know, I shut it off!":o :frownthre (yes, I am blond)

:roflblack:roflblack:roflblack:roflblack:roflblack :roflblack:roflblack

Those are bad.

borrowed from another nearby forum.

A married couple were asleep when the phone rang
at 2 in the morning.The very blonde wife picked up the phone,
listened a moment and said 'How should I know, that's 200 miles
from here!' and hung up.

The husband said, 'Who was that?'

The wife answered, 'I don't know, some woman wanting to know
if the coast is clear.'

************************************************** ***

A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and
buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really
angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is
overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.

The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do it!!!'

The blonde replies, 'Shut up, you're next!'


Thanks Vortec @ MTF

:tour

Good ones!

Why do Blondes have TGIF written in their shoes?
Because Toes Go In First.

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
She was rejecting all the W's.

The blonde dialed 911 and said, "hurry, come quick my house is on fire". The dispatcher asked, "how do we get there?" She replied, "DUH, drive the big red truck".

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/63/204703591_2d99b95f03.jpg?v=0

:doh

Not Blonde but I thought you would like
WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:


Men Are Just Happier People--

Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.
You can never be pregnant.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another petrol station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks and engines.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.


Your underwear is £8.95 for a three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

Send this to the women who can handle it and to the men who will enjoy reading it

Why couldnt the blonde make kool aid?
She couldnt figure out how to get 2 qts. of water in that little packet.

What does it mean when a blondes toes keep curling up during "the act"?
She forgot to take her panty hose off again.