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A father in-law update and a few things I dont understand

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Posted 8th December 2011 at 04:44 by Quebeker

My father in-law was diagnosed with lung cancer a while back and on September 13th, a day before his birthday, he went under the knive to get a chunk of his left lung out.

They ended up removing the whole left lung and part of a rib.

Then a few weeks ago, during a scan to check things out, they saw some spots on the right lung.
That aint good at all.
And yes, it cancer in the remaining lung.

So now he's going thru chemo, odds are he will be OK for a while but mentally, he's doing like shit. He's depressed and he's acting in a way we have never seen before, he acts (and looks) like he's giving up.

That I understand. What I dont get is how is he now absolutely freaking out and go into full panic mode?
I would be a complete asshole all of the time if it was me, just thinking about it almost triggers panic attacks.
And I would just say "Screw it" and buy a pack of smokes. "Whats the point anyway?"
But at the same time, I cant believe 3 of his daughters keep on smoking, not caring if he's there, sitting outside with them.
Its so disrespectful and totally enraging.

He smoked a LOT most of his life and quit about 12 years ago and not happy that it still caught up to him.

Myself, it's been 6 years today since my last one and my wife 8 years.

It makes me very sad to think that he most likely will be gone shortly (I think so mostly because of his attitude) and I told Eva-Mae that she must give him hugs and kisses and tell him she loves him every single time she sees him because he needs it, and we dont know when her hug will be the last one.

, now Im almost crying.
He may be a Newfie, and very annoying almost all of the time but I love the guy.
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  1. Old Comment
    Gcram399's Avatar
    Not much you can do or say to change things here. Just continue to be supportive. Even if he doesn't actually acknowlege your being there for him and the family, he will know.
    I hope everything works out.
    Posted 13th December 2011 at 03:25 by Gcram399 Gcram399 is online now
  2. Old Comment
    Baphomet's Avatar
    I watched my mom die of cancer in 2001 and then watch as my dad died of cancer (started out in his lungs) in 2005. Just last year my MIL who used to take rides with me on the back of my Sporty died of cancer. Each one of them handled it a little differently. While my mom still had her wits about her I asked her if she was afraid of dying. She asked me if I was. I told her no, of course not. She said, "then neither am I".

    When my dad was under the lethal eye of hospice I would go visit him. One time he told me, "You need to get out of here and be with the living." He meant my wife and kids. I left that day, but when I returned the next he wanted me there. I wasn't there when he died, but the day before I told him it would probably be the last time we'd ever see each other. I knew he wouldn't make it another day. You can tell those things after a while.

    I don't know. I guess nobody knows how they will act until it is their time. I know that I honestly don't fear death in the least ... but then I have no terminal illness either. I think I will go gracefully, but if I don't I then hope my family will understand.
    Posted 17th December 2011 at 00:16 by Baphomet Baphomet is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Quebeker's Avatar
    Wow, posted this almost 2 years ago.
    Father in law, climbed up the hill and is (was) doing fine. Came out of his funk and was back to almost normal (he is a newfie after all, never was normal in the 1st place).
    But...a few weeks ago, he started being short of breath and generally feeling like shit.
    Luckily, our family Doctor retired and we have a new one and she's on the ball. She sent him to all the test, no wasted time and see him back hours after the test results are in.
    But that doesn't mean it's good news.
    He has a mass on his (last and only) lung, about an inch square.
    The specialist was shooting straight with him, he said that they still had to make a biopsy to see if it's cancer or not but it doesn't look good.
    This time they cant chop it off so it's radiation. If it works, good.
    If it doesn't...
    Posted 12th October 2013 at 04:49 by Quebeker Quebeker is offline
  4. Old Comment
    Quebeker's Avatar
    Radiation treatments are all done. Now gotta wait a bit before finding outif it worked.
    Posted 4th December 2013 at 23:14 by Quebeker Quebeker is offline
 

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